I am Nigerian, a country where sex crimes are seldom talked about or in most cases...they are swept under the rug. I am Nigerian, a country where your neighbor's house-boys and your house-maids touch your kids inappropriately. They are also your children's first teachers in the act of oral sex. Yes, I am Nigerian; I am of a country where Uncle Eric touches you in the wrong places and walks free. A country, where husbands beat their wives without repercussion, and where the shame of rape is exclusively the victim’s and hardly ever reported. I am Naija, a country shipping its women to Europe as sex trafficking victims.
I am Nigerian, a kinswoman to the ABSU 5.
I am not here to berate Nigeria, neither am I writing to focus on the good. I am also aware that all countries have the evils I mentioned above. However, like I said, I am Nigerian simply observing the evils and pointing it out.
I did not see the video of the five alleged Abia State University students raping a woman for an hour, but reading about the news sickens me. I do not understand evil, and I could never comprehend how people can blatantly hurt others and laugh it off. The depth of the human heart decay blows my mind. There are so many versions to the story, and I will not be relaying any one version to you. All that matters is five men raped a woman, video-taped it and put it out for the world to see. That is enough information to make you cringe. It is also reported by many online sources that the authorities at the university and in Abia State either denounced the event or conducted a shabby 48 hours investigation. The investigation ended in the authorities declaring that the evil was not committed by students at the university or in the state. This is apparently a laughable conclusion for many who have watched the video or heard an audio. If you are Nigerian, you know trusting your authorities is number one on your "Do not do" list. Maybe if it was the state governor’s daughter in the video, maybe the investigation would have been longer, thorough and result oriented. I am sick of authorities in Nigeria acting like they do not owe the people their service. The walk on the people, steal money and walk free, Case in point...Babaginda. The ABSU 5 should not be allowed to get away with their crime.
I am further appalled by people's comment online and on twitter. Nothing justifies rape...Nothing justifies rape...Nothing justifies rape. If you ever believe that rape can be justified, you are sick. If you, your sister, your niece, your mother, your cousin or your wife has ever been sexually assaulted on any level, you are much aware that nothing justifies rape.
I am tired of some men, especially those, raised in cultures like mine justifying the oppression of women. Women are not commodities. They are not properties. They are not child bearing machines. They are not maids. Women are not possessions to meet your needs. They are also not created to be violated and assaulted. I am sick of the judgment placed on women who choose a difference course than you deem them worthy of. What the heck did the victim in this video say or do to justify raping her? And to teach her a lesson she will never forget, you saved your ego and manhood by employing four other able-bodied men to teach her a lesson. A lesson I can assure you she will never forget. I pray she heals. So now the deed is done, she is raped and violated. It does not change the fact that your manhood is dead. For every woman you rape, I believe you lose an essential and important part of you. For every act of force on a woman most sacred physical part, a curse is rained upon you. One you cannot escape, save God.
I am also shocked by the women who believe she deserved it. It is like Chris Brown and Rihanna rewind. Women should never be on the side of a rapist, especially against a woman they have never met or heard about. Most people online and on twitter do not know this woman or her story, but are quick to blame her for her tragedy. It is a tragic. I cannot begin to comprehend what if feels like to be touched inappropriately or raped by a man you trust or who is supposed to be protecting you or by someone you do not know. I am sure it carries the same feeling of shame and pain. Every time you hear of another victim, you cringe and relive that experience all over again. You are right there in the room you innocently walked into as an 8 year old girl or a 24 year old woman. You may never forget the feeling of shame, angst and guilt. You might say to yourself “maybe if I had stayed upstairs instead of coming down the stairs,” or “maybe if I had gone with my friends instead of staying home to read a book.” Many times, the lines are blurred, but you have sworn that this will never happen to you again or to the ones you love or the random lady who lives next door.
I believe the experience of a rape victim is made worst by others who blame her and hurl insult at her. The experience is not made better by comments like “Rape is surprise sex” or “Just forget about it, and move on with your life”
ABSU 5 cannot walk freely. For each one of the 5 who walks free, there is a woman in pain. For each one of the 5 who falls in love later in life and has kids, there is a woman wondering when men would stop hurting and start protecting. For one of the 5 who graduates from ABSU and proceeds to practice law, there is a victim who desires justice. For each free-swinging rapist, there is a victim dead and hopeless.
I am glad to see that despite all of the above, people are not letting this atrocity go. Nigerians are not shutting up to the authorities. Nigerians at home and in the diaspora are standing up and speaking up for one person.
So, yes, I am Nigerian, a country where the people are demanding justice for ABSU rape victim. I was raised Nigerian, a country where the youths have taken to the internet streets asking for justice. If nothing else happens, then at least everyone in Nigeria and on the Internet must know that these men are rapists. A country where celebrities and every-day people are not shutting up until these men are caught and dumped in prison. I am Naija, a country where culture is slowly changing, but it is changing. Our men are standing up and our women are denoucing sex crimes.
I am Nigerian, a kinswoman to the ABSU victim.
[Photo Credit]
365 days times a lifetime got us here.
